Having confidence in yourself and your abilities is a vital building block in life. Without self-confidence it can be hard to interact socially, reach out and get the job you want. It can affect your relationships and more.
Self-confidence is defined as:
“A feeling of trust in one’s abilities, qualities, and judgement.”
Another phrase relating to yourself is self-esteem which means:
“Confidence in one’s own worth or abilities; self-respect.”
Imagine what it would be like if you had:
- confidence in your own worth
- confidence/trust in your abilities
- self-respect
- a feeling of trust in your qualities
- a feeling of trust in your judgement
It would be pretty amazing, right?
There are a number of factors that can affect your self-esteem and self-confidence:
- Past failures whether this is a failure in a relationship, failure at a job, not achieving something you set out to do etc.
- The people you associate with – people that bring you down and make you feel smaller
- Negative thoughts and criticisms about yourself
Of the above three points, the last one is probably one of the biggest causes of lack of self-confidence and self-esteem.
What we say to ourselves has a bigger effect on how we think than anything someone else says. Think about it – if you fully believed in yourself and your abilities what someone else says wouldn’t matter!
Here’s an exercise to try:
- Think of at least 3 things about yourself that are positive things. It doesn’t matter what they are as long as they are positive.Examples: My hair looks good; I’m friendly to people; I have some good friends; I’m good at writing; My sense of fashion is good
- Every day, for 14 days write down a new thing about yourself that is positive.
- After 14 days review all the things you’ve written down. Take a look at how you feel about yourself. Do you have more confidence? Do you feel better about yourself?
Here’s a little worksheet to download to help you do that.
Look out for a new article about how the people you associate with an affect your self-confidence.